13 and 1/2 Things in “About Time” That Are Unbelievable

(Time Travel Hijinks Not Included)

abouttime2So we’re a little late on this. Sorry. At least we’re not going to make any terrible jokes about time travel to apologize for the fact that this movie came out last August. Just celebrate the fact that it’s now available to rent on iTunes, and be merry.

We actually loved this movie. Richard Curtis, what do you do to us? How do you know? But we did have some qualms with the story of Tim (Domhnall Gleeson, aka one of the Weasley brothers from Harry Potter) who learns that he can travel through time. He uses this skill to woo his girlfriend, then wife, Rachel McAdams. He also basically solves all of his family’s problems, as well as those of some friends of the family.

"Haha! It's so funny when you hold a knife in a way that slices your hand in two!"

“Haha! It’s so funny when you hold a knife in a way that slices your hand in two!”

But even though we liked the movie overall, it doesn’t mean we didn’t have some issues with it. And no, they weren’t about the believability of time travel itself, or even about the fact that Rachel McAdams has some weird time-travel fetish (this is her third movie to feature it, after The Time Traveler’s Wife and Midnight in Paris).

Nope. There were 13 1/2 things we found about the movie that are less believable than the time-travel bit.

1. A 19-year-old boy has a poster of Amélie on his wall? No.

2. Margot Robbie — make that Leonardo Dicaprio’s WIFE in The Wolf of Wall Street, is a teenage love interest. Creepy.

3. A lawyer referring to himself “lawyering.” Pretty sure there is a more technical term for this work.

4. An American repeatedly using the words “quite,” “lovely,” “fringe,” and “frock.” As Americans in London, we can tell you that these girls do exist, but they are terrible. Half point.

5. An American girl lives in London and a) works as a reader at a publishing house, an IMPOSSIBLE JOB TO GET and b) OWNS A CAR. She neither makes enough money to own a car in London, nor is she smart enough for that job (see point 4).

6. Girls do not “love” Kate Moss. They either grudgingly respect her or are slightly terrified of her.

7. Redheaded boys know better than to travel in packs in the UK. They are a persecuted species.

From the premiere, both stars looking infinitely more attractive (in Rachel's opinion).

From the premiere, both stars looking infinitely more attractive — must be something from the future

8.”You go, girl!”

9. Alcoholism has never been cured by sitting by the person’s bedside until they have a magical realization that they should give up drinking just because you have sat there for 48 hours.

10. Men are not self-aware enough to give their best friends nicknames like “Dodgy Jay.” Only girls do this.

11. Mary freaks out about Ian McEwan’s manuscript being ruined by a toddler. It is a computer print-out, and her computer is right there.

12. No woman has ever referred to her breasts as “these puppies.” **

13. British people freaking out about the rain at the wedding. The British would have to be psychotic to freak out about something that happens approximately five times per day.

14. Rachel McAdams playing a woman in her early 20s. Okay, actually the most unbelievable, yet true fact is that Rachel McAdams is thirty-five. When did this happen?

** Jess just said that she’s done this, but it was ironically. Point detracted.